The Beatles Let Their Hair Down (1965)

Photographer Henry Presser interviews Ringo on the flight from Lyon to Paris about these questions

 

The Beatles Let Their Hair Down

By Melinda McCracken

The Hamilton Spectator

November 20, 1965

    What's behind a Beatle? Teenage fans have scratched, scuffed, screamed, and done everything to get close to their idols, but the mystery of the unknown Beatle remains unsolved. The public still doesn't know what really goes on underneath those thick mops of hair, that is, if their heads hold anything but more hair. 

    Well, even the genius of Marcel Proust, the great French thinker who died in 1922, couldn't fathom the Beatles. Proust, much admired for his brilliance at Paris salons during the Belle Époque, devised a set of questions to probe personalities. They were used as a parlor game to amuse salon people who quickly grew bored with one another's wit but had little to do except be clever. Imagine the flutterings and ooh la la's of perfumed ladies and intellectual dandies as they savor the delight of the first psychological quiz.

     During a plane trip, the questions were given to the Beatles to fill out. John Lennon, the author, declined to answer, but George Paul and Ringo complied. The Liverpool lads, famous for their mastery of the flip retort and tired, perhaps of too many questions and interviews made hash of Proust, as you can see by their answers. 

For which mistakes do you have the most indulgence? 

George: I forgot just now. Sir.

Paul, mine. 

Ringo, good ones. 

Your favorite heroines in real life.?

George: Sophie Tucker and Ella Phant

 Paul:  Bernadette Chesakovitch and Marcel Proust

Ringo:  Billy the Kid.

Your favorite painter?

George: Hitler

Paul:  secret. 

Ringo:  John Lennon

Your favorite musician:

George Bert Kaemfart

 Paul:  Allan-a-Dale (one of Robin Hood's merry men who was also a minstrel.)

 Ringo: Yussef Lateef

 The quality you prefer in a girl. 

George: loose morals.

 Paul:  a healthy mind. 

Ringo: A lot of things. 

Your favorite virtue?

 George: The Three Stooges. 

Paul: Goodness.

 Ringo, the duck-billed virtue. 

 What do you appreciate most in your friends?

 George:  their lungs

 Paul:  togetherness. 

Ringo:  five feet, 11 inches.

Your main default. 

George: brake lining and gearbox.

 Paul: Pigeon, chest. 

Ringo: five feet eight inches. 

What would be your greatest misfortune? 

George: having no limbs.

Paul: to live my life again another way.

 Ringo: two feet, nine inches. 

Your favorite poets:

George: Dobby and Gray Ltd ( an English company John Lennon made up)

Paul:  Adrian Mitchell, Bob Danvers Walker (real poets)

Ringo: Bob Dylan 

Your heroines in history

George: Jeff of Arc, 

Paul: Elizabeth I,  Marcel Proust

Ringo: Lady Godiver.

Your favorite names? 

George:  Tom, Albert, Sydney 

Paul: Nathaniel, Anna, Relf, Gobbo, Belt, Corset. 

Ringo: Roach, joint

A natural gift you would like to have.

George: speech

Paul: a watch.

Ringo: six feet one inch. 

Who are your favorite heroes in novels? 

George : Jimmy Olsen (Superman's pal)

 Paul Juan in The Wayward Bus. Harris Tweed in The Eagle (an English comic book)

Ringo:  Don't know

What is you for you the height of misery?

George: Having no sugar in my tea. 

Paul:  being woken up after two hours of sleep.

 Ringo, nowhere to sleep.

 Your heroines in fiction

George: Mrs. Biggles (she was just great)

 Paul:  Lois Lane (Superman's Girlfriend) Marcel Proust.

 Ringo:  Pansy Potter (an American pop singer.)

 Your favorite occupation? 

George: growing tall. 

Paul mine.

 Ringo: sleeping. 

What would you like to be?

 George: A corn flake

 Paul: a church.

 Ringo:  six feet, one inch.

 How would you like to die? 

George: asleep, please. 

Paul: gracefully with speed.

 Ringo: quick. 

Present state of your mind. 

George: 10% alcohol.

 Paul: puzzled. 

Ringo: fuzzy.

Your motto: 

George: non nobis solum sed toti mundo nati.

Paul: Have faith in God, and you will see his light make bright your day.

 Ringo: Be kind to your dog, and you will always have a friend.

 Does this impromptu display of Beatleish wit mean that the Beatles are clowns to the core, or is it a cover-up like their hair or their inability to take themselves seriously? Only their hairdresser knows for sure.